Friday, February 24, 2017
MM This Week in Fake News
In Rome, following a massive stroke, Pope Francis resigned. In the fastest gathering of the College of Cardinals yet seen, American Cardinal Raymond Burke was elected as the Successor of St Peter, taking the name of Pope Innocent XIV. There appear to be many changes going on behind the walls of the Vatican but we have been told that by next month Pope Innocent XIV will have a coronation to mark the beginning of his pontificate, the first since the coronation of Pope Paul VI in 1963. The new Pontiff has made it clear that he shall be very different from his predecessor but said he intends to be crowned with the Papal Tiara of Pope Francis as “a fitting tribute” to the now former Pontiff. However, pundits are still arguing over whether this is actually meant to honor Francis or a not-so-subtle slap in the face of the previous Bishop of Rome most known for his ostentatious public displays of humility.
On the North American continent, while forging ahead with his plan to build a wall on the southern border, President Trump was presented with a proposal from friend and former UKIP leader Nigel Farage for the United States of America to join the British Commonwealth of Nations as an “Associate Member” with the Royal Commonwealth Society currently in negotiations concerning the opening a branch office in New York City to work toward that goal. The plan reportedly has the support of Queen Elizabeth II and was undertaken at the present time due to the often-expressed admiration that Donald Trump’s late royalist mother had for the Queen. The White House was, according to Andrew Wigmore, “very positive” about the proposal for the United States to join the Commonwealth, made up almost exclusively of countries formerly part of the British Empire.
This has been totally Fake News from The Mad Monarchist, all the news from around the world that is completely fake and unfit to print. Unfortunately.
(For those who did not spot it, the one accurate story was the paragraph about the proposal presented to the White House for the United States to join the British Commonwealth. That did actually happen.)