Royal News: A Prince in the State of Nature

Everyone in the world knows by now. I don’t doubt that everyone from natives in the Fiji Islands to pygmies in darkest Africa have heard about Prince Harry and a mystery girl frolicking in the nude in a hotel room in Las Vegas. It has even made primetime news in the United States though why exactly any American citizen should be concerned about what Prince Harry does on his vacations is quite beyond me. That is the real story as far as I am concerned; why on earth is this a story at all? Perhaps someone can explain it to me because the more I think about it the more I am utterly baffled as to why this is newsworthy at all. Even those who simply wish to look at naked bodies will be disappointed, the Prince did cover his ‘naughty bits’ so, in that regard, a number of royals have been caught at greater disadvantage. He was not photographed actually engaged in any sort of “activity”. So, what is all the fuss about really? A game of strip pool? Wild parties with women of questionable integrity? I’m sorry folks, but there really isn’t much reason to be in Las Vegas at all if these sorts of things bother you and no one seemed to have a problem with the Prince visiting “Sin City” before. And if you’re going to get naked, isn’t your hotel room a perfectly acceptable place to do that? It’s not as if he was letting it all hang out in public or bothering anyone else. The cohort of co-eds who have been making the rounds of the news shows in America seemed perfectly thrilled to be there.

So, what exactly is it that people (mostly the media) have a problem with about this? Is taking your clothes off in your hotel room a crime? I hope not, or I’m in trouble myself. Is it the fact that there was a girl present, likewise in her birthday suite? I have pretty “old fashioned” views when it comes to this sort of stuff but I didn’t think so many other people did, particularly the news media. It cannot be that shocking that the Prince could be engaging in sexual behavior before marriage, after all, does anyone honestly think that the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge were sleeping in separate beds all that time they were living together up in Balmoral before their wedding? Does the Church of England even consider premarital sex a sin these days? I have to ask that sincerely because, if they do, it would seem rather hypocritical considering what they DO consider perfectly acceptable behavior in other areas. Don’t misunderstand me, I am not a big fan of what Prince Harry did here. Not the strip pool part, that could be perfectly innocent, but he went to a “Wet Republic” party and I absolutely oppose any prince of the blood attending any function with the word “republic” in its name.

No, my problem here is that the same people who claim that royals are no better than anyone else, that they should not be treated differently than anyone else and that they shouldn’t even be royals at all are the same ones who hold them to an entirely different standard and who expect them to embody values their society as a whole abandoned a long time ago. I object to the invasion of privacy and I object to the oh-so-phony pretended “outrage” of people in the media over this. And I just don’t understand why people act like this is news! Prince Harry has been to Las Vegas before, I’ve been to Las Vegas before and let me tell you: *this is what happens there*. It probably happened last time but no one got a picture of it. And let me assure everyone that even if the Prince had not been in Las Vegas, even if he had not been partying, even if there had not been one slutty chick in sight, the media is going to run with any picture of an unclothed royal they can get their grubby little hands on. The circumstances do not matter. This happens fairly often actually, you just don’t seem to get the tons of fake shock and horror that you do when a Windsor is involved.

Take another royal (princely but whatever) family near to my heart. Shall we tabulate the number of times we have seen pictures of members of the House of Grimaldi with their ‘naughty bits’ showing? So what is the difference? Well, none were at wild parties in Vegas but were either on the beach or the family yacht, but there is more to it than that. In Monaco and the south of France, flashing flesh at the beach or on your yacht is not a big deal, everyone does it, nobody really cares and nobody pretends that it is outrageous. Every time I have seen the story of Prince Harry mentioned on the news I have to wonder, do people in Britain just have no idea what Las Vegas is all about and what goes on there? Because this is happening in Vegas every day of the week. You might want to sit down for this but (brace yourselves) there are people getting drunk, gambling, going to strip clubs, “hooking up” or employing call girls in Las Vegas at this very moment! Yes, it’s true! And for the most part, that is why people go there. If you want to snort crack off the belly of a hooker, you go to Las Vegas, it’s a place where anything goes. I thought this was common knowledge and compared to what often goes on in “Sin City” (you might think the nickname would give it away) a little game of strip pool in the “privacy” of your own hotel suite is pretty darn tame.

So, given all of that, why does the media suddenly sound like Claude Rains in “Casablanca”? Did these people really think that, during his time off, Prince Harry sat around drinking tea and reading his prayer book? Maybe I’m out of touch but I thought Prince Harry was pretty well known for being the wild, hard-drinking, girl-grabbing party animal of the family? This is not news! And what would happen if the opposite were true? For myself, I’m fairly certain that if Prince Harry were championing traditional values and going to church every Sunday, these same media morons would be criticizing him for being old-fashioned, out of touch and too Christian for the modern, multicultural, multi-religious Britain of today. He might even be called “intolerant” though he would probably have to change denominations for that to stick since the only commandment of the C of E these days seems to be “we tolerate everything”. Should the prince have known better? Yes, no matter how nice the friendly girl who just showed you her dairy department seems, she will sell pictures of you to the tabloids for a quick buck. Do I approve of his behavior? No, but I don’t need to, it’s none of my business. I feel bad for any embarrassment this might have caused the Queen but when I look at modern society, modern schools and universities and certainly (in Britain) the modern established Church, I cannot be surprised that anyone would behave like this no matter who they are.

For me, that is the bottom line. Given my worldview and my moral code, I can see why I think what Prince Harry did was wrong. What I cannot see is why the modern mainstream media or the vast majority of society would even consider it newsworthy at all. This only proves that even while we may have very low standards these days, we are still capable of having double-standards as well. It isn’t fair and it doesn’t make sense to me but, it must be said, that is the situation and Prince Harry should know that. He is a nearly 30-year-old man, an officer in the British army and he should know that if he behaves like this it will inevitably be made public, embarrass the Royal Family (or the Queen at least) and it will be used by republicans to attack the monarchy. All the uproar is uncalled for but the Prince should have known better too, especially given his own track record. It may not be anything really, really terrible, but it’s not necessary either. It may not matter much today, but it just might in the future. Royals who live a libertine lifestyle may be loved by many people but they are seldom respected in the same way that someone like the Queen is and, personally, I suspect the Queen never felt she was entitled to have fun -at least not the sort of fun others (even Princess Margaret) had. The Queen has maintained the monarchy because she has never given an inch to the republicans, never shown one moment of weakness for them to exploit. She has lived her life for her country and not for herself. Prince Harry, and all other royals, would do well to remember that.